On my (almost daily) velocipedal perambulations (that’s “bike rides”), I occasionally have run-ins with various canine would-be assailants. A Cairn terrier I passed today took after me with such force that he failed to avoid the chain-link fence in front of him. This was amusing. A Rottweiler that charges a fence is rather less so…
When bicycles first began to roam the countryside, this was a perennial problem, exacerbated by the fact that most dogs went unrestrained. So what to do when you’re ever so slowly climbing a hill on your cycle and a pack of vicious hounds sets upon you?
There’s a gat for that.
Unlimbering yourself from your iron steed, you withdraw from your pocket the latest in sporting technology, the Velo-Dog revolver, and unleash a furious barrage. Unnerved by your dogged pluck, the ruffians disperse, and you carry on with your day.
The Velo-Dog moniker is a mashup of velocipede (an early name for cycles that didn’t stick) and dog. The Velo-Squirrel concept was stillborn, though it might be more relevant today. But dispatching critters with a revolver as you pedal merrily along is apparently confined to the halcyon days of yore, as folks these days might take umbrage if you unleashed a fusillade on Fluffy. Or Princess. Or whatever cutsey name that has been incorrectly applied to the set of teeth trying to attach itself to your Achilles tendon. However, the incensed owners might let you off with a warning if they knew how anemic the 5.75mm round was (less than a modern .22LR).
Sure, you could carry any old pocket gun with you everywhere else in 1900, but if you were going to be on a cycle, you apparently needed a special cycling gun. Thought I’d share that interesting little bit of vintage marketing there for your amusement.